jimmy-gym

whoa blogging beast,

looks like you have a lot more time to blog now that you left your job (hopefully by submitting a 2-week-notice poem)! and i see you've been reviewing gyms, but there are a few things that bug me about gyms:

1. the equipment

gym owners assume people know what Gruntal Trek is and how to work the latest Hoakie 3000, so lotsa guessing involved...

made in sweden

2. the people 

i walk in ready to pump it up, the next thing you know guys are trying to compete at running-in-place and girls are all like "why are you eating a sandwich?!" 

3. the building, the parking lot, and eau de musk

so that's why i spend time outdoors training for my 0.5K Walk (to the bar), hoping that will motivate me to sign up for the Death Awareness Fun Run. 

(did you know people die every year in the United States alone?!     ....some of them from rabies.)

and like all great athletes of our time, we should get sponsors, that way people that work can pay for our playtime!

not endorsing: bacon lube.

z

p.s. flakers gonna flake. i bet they'd come play if you promised them a stripper. #brilliantdukelaxideas